BE A SELF LOVE JUNKIE !!

Karuna Budhathoki
Sep 21, 2020
5 min read

Owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we'll ever do.

Let's face it, on these months of being fixed at home, grounded has induced either judgemental side or pity feeling on ourselves. Eating, gaining and movie marathon is favourite of all time. This behavioural pattern was something we used to wish when we were back before the pandemic. But still, we're here, wishing all these things to go away as soon as possible.

Life now, for the introvert, is like a blessing because the couch is a haven, and the show race is love. But still, life is not all occupied by the continuous hours of social media. So we get lonely after hours of scrolling. Maybe the part of the reason is all those so-called "perfectionism" that we see in social media, which makes us feel void inside. The thousands of failed hours are concealed. And all we see is the good-best-sugarcoated things. By seeing those 1000s best things in a day, might make us feel like a sore loser, even though we deeply know, Rome wasn't made in a DAY.

The self-love is often damaged when the brain starts consuming a series of critics and negative judgements. Our mind is so capable of scratching those toxic opinions, even though we consciously know that's something unhealthy to perceive.

The mind has this tendency of alternating the reality in what we see as a game of CHINESE WHISPER. For instance, we know the truth of Photoshop, being widely used in show businesses, from the high field of magazine covers to advertisements of simple products. But still, we cynically let it consume us. Stretch marks and wrinkles are considered as red flags of flaws which causes distress. Every skin is pretty and every body is a beautiful body.

Perfectionism is the BULLSHIT that has makeup on. I'm here on my home constantly locking my room and eating all the junk foods I like despite the fact I know it's wrong. I just got this habit of sticking around unhealthy things which just drains the motivations from me.

So here are some of the tips that'll help you to get yourself all the love from yourself that you truly deserve.

Don't take shit from anyone and cut off toxic people.

Some so many toxic people are just there to put you down. These toxic people might be your friend, your crush, your desperate admirer, your family, or your relatives. Don't ever take negative critic from anyone. Even if you hear somebody's "JUDGEMENT" in the form of their "OPINION", shake it off as Queen Taylor does because haters gonna hate, hate, hate. Fake company is like a SNAKE, it'll hiss if you take a major growing step in your life and intoxicate with their venomous actions to hurt you. They'll cause some inflicting wreck in your life.

So it's better to cut off toxic people as soon as possible. But always remember you must be true and good enough to do the right things and make the right choices for a happy environment around you. Live your life by your limits.

Uplift the positive environment and fix relationships from time to time.

Life isn't always filled with toxic people. There is always someone uplifting you. They're mostly your best friends or your loving family member. Always be happy for them and uplift their quality of life by doing some generous thing. They're your asset which you're most grateful to god. Treat them better. Even if you or they mess up sometimes, FIX IT. They're way more important and better than those fake ass-holes always putting you down. Always lean on them and make them feel like QUEENS (or KINGS) because they deserve it.

Remember, all people who like you don't love you always and all people who get angry with you sometimes don't hate you always. Incline the relationship status quo with people who love you, over time.

Don't sacrifice your wills and desire by being someone else.

The stereotypical patriarch society in the eastern community believes that "An ideal woman is a blend of feminine character who doesn't fight for her right and stays quiet all the time." That shit is crazy AF. You can't just sit on the couch and let a destiny show you your dream. You'll love yourself and have a special amount of self-respect when you have got this courage to do something that scares you. Trust me! When I just finish my 30 min workout session, in the end, I feel so confident and happy about myself. So, find your "ideal-workout" which will make you pleased about yourself every time you finish it.

Most people are living their life pretending something they're not. It's hard to find something that you like. And that's understandable. But to find something you like, you must try many things and settle at something that you love. Don't fear failures.

Be honest and impartial with yourself.

You must allow feelings to flow over at its movement, but you shouldn't let it deposit at your heart. To prevent that, you must be honest with yourself. Honesty is the long term self-growth that a person can access. Always prioritise your needs and desires and work on them. (If you want to read more then, There's an article about accepting negativity.)

Like Monica Geller from F.R.I.E.N.D.S says "The real-life SUCKS, but you'll love it". Let the negativity move sometime and concede that it's normal to have that lacunae in life. But it's always dependable on you to fill those by self-healing or self-learning process. ENJOY THE MOMENT.

Don't plunge yourself into temporary upsetting things.

We often are infatuated by someone or something that we see. Whether it be "a hot guy from the street" or that "beautiful baddie girl of Instagram". Strong people control their desires and limit their overthinking. But hey! There're some other communities of people, who are just a traveller of "the black hole of thoughts". And we all know what happens in a black hole, YOU'RE TRAPPED.

Distractions and Overthinking might seem very impossible to overcome, but hey! It's your mind you've to control, not your mind controlling you. So limit the Distractions and Overthinking will eventually go out. Stop lying in your bed and imagine this whole "WHAT-IF" situation that doesn't even exist in your life in a parallel universe. Sounds brutal, but the truth hurts.

I've said it many times on my speeches and I'll say it again, "In the end, it's always you with you." Don't let petty things consume your very existence. GO GUYS AND GALS!!! AND ENJOY THAT AWESOME SPRINKLES AND FLAVOURS THAT LIFE SERVES YOU!!